How To Be Happy

    I have recently fallen into a lovely little slump of self pity, where I was greeted by bitterness and his friend  agoraphobia! It was a really lovely trip, but I decided to leave and come back to a lovely, happier, reality.
I figured that I can't be the only one trying to be a happier person, so, I've written a list of some of the things I've personally done in order to feel happier.


How To Be Happy

 Shave your legs 

This one is for the girls. Trust me, I know as much as the next single girl that shaving your legs sounds about as fun as carrying groceries from the store to you house, in the middle of a rain storm. BUT, I also know that I feel like quite the catch when my legs are shaved. Thus, I would suggest taking those extra few minutes, shave your legs and throw on a dress.

Dance

Right now, get in your underwear and just shake that. I would suggest to throw this playlist on while you do it, made by yours truly;

http://8tracks.com/allyparadis/dance-party-for-one

Lay down on the floor of a home where there are multiple domesticated animals

Come on. Don't tell me that three puppies loving you unconditionally doesn't help.

On the other hand, if your friend Steve who has two pet tigers offers, pass up. Trust me.

Stay away from Pintrest 

This is probably the most important one. Just don't go on pintrest. It's full of girls who look like they can put photoshop out of commission. Plus, our cupcakes NEVER look like they do on Pintrest. Bastards.

Go for a drive 

This one isn't suggested if you're angry. You'll drive too fast and die. Don't do that.
On the other hand, if you feel trapped and have a big ole case of house-arrest (not the actual legal kind. In that case, stay inside.) then get in that car or on that bike, or basically anything that moves, and get lost somewhere.

Clean your room

Pretend that the queen is in town and she has just been dying to see your room. DON'T DISAPPOINT THE QUEEN. Clean your room. Then all of a sudden, you're clutter free and have more space for extra activities.

Make a card for someone 

I love this one. Write a nice little card for someone. Not one where you just add the persons name before the cheesy paragraph, but something where you actually let them know that they're important. I know you feel like shit and probably think "ooooh I'm so alone in this world." You're not. Someone else feels like shit out there, and just in case it's the person you're making the card for, make it nice.

Wear a bright color

It feels better than walking around in black. Enough said.

Call your "person"

Your "person" is that one somebody that is always there for you and knows how to handle you when you're being irrationally bitter. Call them. Maybe even make that card for them, in your clean room, while wearing a bright color.

Get dressed up and go anywhere

I love this one. Sometimes I put a cute dress on and go to shoppers drugmart. Then, when someone says "Oh I love your dress!" you can say "Oh! Thank you! I just put this little old thing on to come grab toothpaste because my wealthy husband William is taking me on a cruise to the Bahamas on our new private cruise ship. He got it because he's just so rich and doesn't know what to do with all of the money since we bought our seventh home on the water front. We just love water front. He once bought an island for me because I don't like public beaches. He's so sweet. But yes, so we ran out of toothpaste today and here I am!" or something along those lines.

Don't reply to destructive texters

Destructive texters are people who when you see their names on your phone, you know it'll end up with them complaining about someone or something. Just stay away from them. Concentrate on yourself for today.

Only eat breakfast foods for an entire day

Oh this one is nice. I spent all day two days ago only eating Corn Pop cereal. It was so nice.
I felt like I was this five year old kid left alone in the house and was like "OH MY GOD. I CAN DO ANYTHING I WANT! CEREAL ALL DAY!!!". Actually, that's exactly how that day went for me.


Well, those are mine for now. I'll almost certainly do an updated version, so please do comment with your own ideas. I'm sure they are just great. Unless they include a gun. In that case, please, just relax.

Here are some that were suggested by friends;

"listen to covers of "hey ya" on YouTube" -John Alexander

""Bubblewrap" - Jesse Noel

""really loud disney sing along, wearing a disney costume, alone in 

my apartment" - Nikki Saulnier 

""Tylerknott.com" - Renée Comeau

Later Days!
Ally